


ooh girl, you shock me like an electric eel

by lesbianbey



Category: Freakish (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Bisexual Male Character, Enemies to Friends, Everyone Is Gay, Gay/Straight Alliances, Humor, Lesbian Character(s), M/M, No Chemical Spill, Student Council, also there's some background natalie/zoe, casual homophobia, listen this show may be cancelled but these characters are still near and dear to my gay heart, selective hearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-13
Updated: 2018-09-13
Packaged: 2019-07-11 16:57:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,694
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15976553
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lesbianbey/pseuds/lesbianbey
Summary: Barrett hated student council, but he enjoyed being president. But then he's overthrown and there's this cute treasurer and it all goes to shit.





	ooh girl, you shock me like an electric eel

**Author's Note:**

> title is from electric feel by mgmt (for a modern version of the song check out coast modern's twist on it)

Student council sucks. It’s mostly bullshit decision making and acting like these seniors give a flying fuck about school. And yet, Barrett finds himself enjoying the shit out of it for half a year.

He’s more rational dictator than creative democrat, shooting down kissing booths and saving the whales during prom ideas, and encouraging actual fucking STEM programs for girls and making people stand up for the national anthem a goddamn choice — because America _sucks_ — and then there’s cutting down on student-teacher relationships that seems to be a theme in Kent County.

For fuck’s sake. The principal couldn’t do his job long enough to fire ephebophilic staff and replace them with people who were not only qualified as fuck but are also revulsed by students advancing on them.

However, his rule over this school comes to an end when the student council cracks him down and says that school life is boring because he hated the idea of a car wash —  codename for wet tee contest for Todds and Chads to ogle half naked teen girls — and wanted more college trips for juniors and sophomores. In other words, student council _sucks_.

Their new eye candy is a rich bitch named Natalie. He hated her. She’s short, she’s demanding, she’s pregnant at the time, she reminds him of that girl from some 90’s family sitcom that Elise made him watch once... _she’s basically him._

But, he still hated her.

She wins by a landslide and Barrett only hangs around because his friend says he makes a great devil’s advocate but Barrett finds himself getting more migraines at every fucking meeting. He’s responsible for briefing minutes, typing them up and presenting them to the student cabinet but he can’t get through one meeting without wanting to rip his hair off.

However, Natalie endorses women-inclusive STEM programs _and_ fucking whale themed dances. It’s a nightmare.

It continues until next year, and most of the student council body fucks off. It’s just him and Natalie, sans her baby bump.

Natalie picks him as VP, some girl as secretary, and some plain motherfucker with the name Grover (from _fricking Sesame Street_ ) as treasurer. Barrett is once again, flabbergasted, and wishes for death.

But then, Grover’s fucking hot and Barrett catches himself ogling, wondering if the wet tee contest idea was still up for grabs and maybe, just _maybe_ , Grover will be the sole car washer.

* * *

 

Weeks into the semester, Grover drops out.

Barrett is seconds away from doing so himself, but then he stops himself.

* * *

 

“Why the hell did you even quit?” A feminine voice questions. Barrett momentarily forgot that his locker is nearby a student named Mary, sister of Grover, which means Barrett doesn’t exactly have to lose staring chances (since he basically forgot that Grover has math, English, and physical education with him).

“I wanted to. Student council isn’t my thing.”

“What do you mean...didn’t you want to get to know that—“

It stops there. Barrett feels terrible for eavesdropping but then he doesn’t. He shuts his locker and heads to english. 

A day later, posters for a colorful ass club starts showing up and Barrett stops himself one time to read the flyer. It’s enticing. It's interesting.

It’s a fucking gay club.

Barrett watches as the delinquent defaces them with his dumbass friend and doesn’t say a thing.

* * *

 

“Barrett, i’m going to need you to go to the first GSA meeting,” Natalie commands. She pushes the flyer in front of him and gives him a tight lipped smile. “The principal wants to shut it down and I told him that we shouldn’t, and to give it a chance. He told me to get on it, but I have to pick up my son from daycare.”

Barrett barely catches the last part, still thinking about this gay club and watching Diesel Turner be a dumbass for a few seconds by defacing property and just this morning, the “friendship” club marching down to the office to make sure the club doesn’t ever exist because _gays_ apparently _ruin the fucking sanctity of marriage_. It’s _fucking_ 2017 and yet the entire Christian religion proves itself to be the worst religious denomination Barrett’s come across, because there’s a bunch of Jim Bobs And Michelle Duggars who want straight relationships _for life._

He’s said it once and he’s gonna say it again: straight people are fucking weird.

“I’ll do it.”

Barrett takes a notepad and a pen and storms down to the music room. The door is wide open and they are only...seven kids inside. His breath hitches when he recognizes tall tanned and handsome sitting next to fucking Mary.

“Hello and welcome!” Zoe Parker grins, and waves down the VP as if he’s here to join forever and not to report on whether this club should stay within these halls or not. “Don’t be shy.”

Barrett decides to sit in the far back because he’s an observer and not fucking gay (except he _is_ ) and not interested in gay related discourse (except he _is_ ) and he’s not freaking out over Grover being here (except he _is_ ). “We should introduce ourselves—“

No, please, fucking no. Barrett had enough of that in middle school.

“—saying our names, indicate our grades, and why we’re here. I’m Zoe, a senior, and I started this club so that we can have our own safe space…even if we’re being threatened by the friendship club.”

Barrett doesn’t remember names well but Zoe, Anka, Mary, and Grover fucking stick. Only because their names are two basic syllables. But when it gets to him, he clams up and grips his pen, staring at his little notepad which has some notes on it (indicating an open door, introductions, and smart jabs at the friendship club — or as he likes to call it, the Duggar Family) and then stares at everyone else. “Uh, Barrett, senior, and i’m here to observe.”

“ _Observe?_ ” A curly haired student asks. “Are you some crappy double agent for the friendship club?”

“I wouldn’t step foot inside the friendship club,” Barrett defends.

“Chillax Birdie, he’s from student council,” Grover speaks up, with an annoyed eye roll. “He’s just here on business. Otherwise, he wouldn’t be here.”

Barrett realizes that’s the first time Grover has ever acknowledged him and he’s screaming inside. But, he gets a glare from Birdie and things go to shit again. Barrett writes down on his notepad - cover, fucking blown. thanks, Jones.

* * *

 

Natalie is thrilled that Barrett had a longer briefing minute. “I’m guessing you had fun?”

Barrett scoffs.

“Ok, grandpa McIntyre.” Barrett hates it when anyone calls him that. Just because he doesn’t laugh at every joke, it doesn’t make him old. “I should probably report this to the principal. He should have no problem keeping it on school grounds.”

“Why do you care?”

Natalie gives Barrett a blank stare. “Are you seriously asking me that?” Barrett nods. “I’m a _lesbian_ , Barrett. Jesus Christ. That means you have some serious selective hearing during these meetings. Plus if I wasn’t gay, I would still give a fuck.”

“You...have a son…”

“So you _were_ listening to that bit,” Natalie smirks. “Yeah. Got drunk and fucked a Chad. Then I realized I was a lesbian while pregnant and now i’m dating my best friend.”

“Addy?”

“No, Zoe.”

Barrett is left shocked as Natalie laughs. Just when he thought there wasn’t anything else he and Natalie shared. But at least Natalie Calloway can say she’s gay with pride. Barrett is still wondering if Grover can crush him with his legs. “Dude, seriously, you need to stop spacing out like that. It creeps me out.”

“Can you blame me for being shocked?”

“Why are you _still_ shocked? Honestly, I thought you would’ve figured it out. You give me major closet case vibes.”

“I’m not a closet case.”

“Staring at the treasurer for the entire meeting until he quits to start the GSA with my girlfriend indicates that you are at least bi.”

“Nope. Don’t like girls.”

Natalie’s smirk grows wider. “Bingo. I knew you were gay.”

“Shit!” Barrett cusses. His lack of filter strikes him at the worst of times. “I didn’t—“

“I know. It’s ok. That’s how I came out to my parents. Said I didn’t like boys and they threatened conversion camp until I told them I was pregnant.”

At that moment, Barrett finds himself actually liking Natalie. “Do they still threaten it?”

“No.”

* * *

 

Barrett goes to another meeting just because he wants to, and plus, it gives him another reason to stare at Grover once again. Plus he shared to Natalie about his crush on Grover and she basically pushed him in there, opting to be the wingman Barrett never had.

(He regrets coming out to Natalie, full stop.)

“You’re back!” Zoe grins. 

“Why not?”

There’s a little more students than he expected, but the only person he can see is Grover, chatting with a dark skinned guy who’s also fucking hot but not Grover hot.

Seriously, he needs that wet tee contest sooner or later.

Grover casts his eyes up and stares at Barrett with brown eyes that twinkle and they crinkle as he smiles and waves. Barrett is almost thrown off until he’s actually thrown off, tripping on a chair. He stumbles but thank god for gravity not failing on him, but he still made a damn fool of himself. Shit.

Barrett glares at a cackling Birdie. Her girlfriend Hailey tries to get her to stop but she’s so far gone. Hailey only gives him a sympathetic look and he ignores it.

The dark guy’s name is Zane but Barrett is still staring at twinkle eye Jones as if he’s the only person in the room. There’s nothing much to mention other than the principal letting the club stay in school and the defaced posters. Everyone knows who it is.

After the meeting, Zane takes him aside and gives him a slip of paper — “Grover wanted me to give you this” he had said — and when Barrett opens it, he finds a series of numbers along with a note.

“Instead of staring, just ask me out” with a fucking winky face.

_Shit_.

* * *

 

Barrett McIntyre isn’t ballsy. He can pass a speech class with flying colors but asking people out is out of the fucking equation. It’s been a week since Grover gave Barrett his number and he hasn’t told a single person what the deal was. But he figures if he waits long enough, Grover will get impatient and either ask him out or date some other damn fool.

He growls and shuts his locker, but not without the fucking idiot who gives him nocturnal emissions every damn night for the past year appearing in front of him. “Do I have to do _everything_ myself?”

“I don’t follow.”

Grover sighs. “You don’t.”

“I may be smart but social cues aren’t my thing, Jones,” he says.

“Yeah, that’s why you keep drooling at me whenever we share a class or go to the meetings. But since you’re socially inept—“

“That’s a big word,” Barrett mocks.

“—I’ve been crushing on you since freshman year.”

Barrett almost wishes he had water to do a full on spit take. “ _What?_ ”

“I want to take you out on a date...maybe on Saturday...we can go see a nice movie, or—“

“I’m still stuck on you crushing on me for almost four years because I literally started liking you this year.” Grover smirks. “Don’t get fucking cocky, Jones. You’ve been pining after me for a long time...how the _fuck_ do you do it?”

“The same way you did it since September. So what do you say to a date? Yes? No? Or are you still stuck?”

An eye roll. “Fine, whatever. A date.”

“So, yes.”

Barrett scoffs halfheartedly.

* * *

 

Saturday comes and the night before, Natalie calls him during one of her postpartum insomnia moments and gives him pep talk. He _almost_ blocks her number.

Grover picks him up and they walk to the theater since it’s within walking distance and it’s a nice day at the valley. Grover talks about his parents working at the chemical plant and Barrett mentions that his parents hate the chemical plant. Barrett even laughs at that, and he _rarely_ ever cracks  a smile.

Grover compliments him on it and his heart soars.

The movie isn’t terrible. They encounter many innuendoes by LaShawn Deveraux working the ticket box and Barrett had to walk away momentarily because Violet Adams, Grover’s ex, kept giving him the stink eye at the concession stand. Her glare ruins his appetite but he still eats popcorn because Grover got a large bucket and the last thing he wanted to do was waste some good popcorn.

When they walk home, they chuckle and relive the moments of the movie that were good, until Grover changes the subject.

“So, who was your closet key? And before you ask me what that is, a person who awakened your gayness just by one look. It can be someone from school, a celebrity—“

“My next door neighbor’s son,” Barrett answers. “He was cutting grass one day and my 13 year old self was playing with a chemistry set. He took off his shirt and I had my first orgasm.”

Grover snorts. “Are you exaggerating?”

“No. I’m serious. Now, what was yours?”

“Uh, don’t laugh at me, but I had a crush on Harry Styles from One Direction.” Barrett laughs anyway. “I told you _not_ to laugh!”

“What, did your sister have a poster on her wall and you went in here and stared at him for too long?”

“No, I took her to her first concert and ended up fangirling over the guy. It was kind of embarrassing but when we went home, Mary and I bonded over Harry for hours. She was the first person I came out to.”

“The first person I managed to tell was the student council President after she told me she was gay...again apparently.”

“Natalie told us that at the first meeting. Man, you do have selective hearing.”

“I didn’t really like Natalie so I drowned her out when she didn’t say something important,” he defends. 

“Can’t argue with that.”

It was then Barrett realized that their homes aren’t far away and he feels completely stupid. Granted it was five homes down but they could’ve been friends so long ago if he wasn’t a socially inept jerkass. “Your stop.”

Barrett grimaces and makes his way towards the front door, but then stops. He turns around and luckily the asshole is still standing there because he impulsively walks back and, despite his blatant inexperience, kisses Grover full force.

He’s even more excited when Grover reciprocates without any hesitation on his part.

When they pull away, cheeks are flushed and words are stammered, neither of them knowing what to say. Barrett wanted to kiss him again but opts to just give a halfhearted smirk.

“ _Interesting_ ,” Grover says.

Barrett rolls his eyes. “Go home, Grover.”

He kisses Barrett for a few seconds. Barrett almost feels his knees giving out as Grover winks before going the direction towards his home.

* * *

 

“ _Fucking finally._ ”

It’s the first thing Natalie says when Barrett walks inside the office and he doesn’t even realize he’s grinning until he frowns. “What the fuck are you talking about?”

“You’re grinning hard and I finalized the reason why to having your lip virginity swiped by Grover Jones. You’re fucking welcome, by the way.”

Barrett then snarls. “I _hate_ you.”

“Hate me all you want but I just got you your first boyfriend without actually putting in much effort. And I take it as gratitude. Lord knows you can be nice when you want but this isn’t the case. That’s why we’re so similar and why I picked you as my VP.”

“I... _you are so irritating,_ ” Barrett admits.

Natalie winks, and leaves the student council room in a hurry. Barrett can feel his headache growing despite having a few weeks without them.

That’s when Grover walks in and wraps his arms around Barrett, lessening the headache. “Let’s walk to class.”

Student council still _sucks_ , though.


End file.
